pg)125 We got home and the motorycle boy read and i waited and smoked. I waited for nothing I just sat there on the mattress. There was a fight one night I'd been cut bad one guys was dead and many injue=red by the motorcycle boy. pg)126 He didn't even care . He was laughing about it all. Old man came in changed his shirt again before he went out. I hadda ask him a question about our mom if she is nuts. He looked and stared then said no. He told me there marriage was bad thats why she left. pg)127 I didn't wanna hear that. I thought she hadda be nuts to marry my dad. She only married him for fun and he married for love. Wonder why he's always so upset that must be horrible. He told me everyone ahs a different look on the world. It doesn't make them crazy just unusual. pg)128 I never understand how he talks so he hadda explain it again in simple terms. My mom was not crazy or my brother why were just stuck in the wrong time. The motorcycle boy didn't even hear us. I told my dad im gonna look just like the motorcycle boy. He looked for awhile. He said, "You better hope not." pg)129 Motorcylcle boy broke into the petstore. I went 
along, I wasn't invited but i just went. I begged him not to kinda like Steve always did to me. He wouldn't listen to me. He kept trying to get the door open. I didn't want him to get caught. pg)130 He got in and turned on the light like an idiot. He just looked around the store and didn't care who saw him. He let out al the animals. I watched cause i was shaking real bad. I just cried and it hurt bad to cry. He had the fish in his hands. I knew where he was going the river. I heard the cop sirens and just tried to run. I head a mixture of noises. I was at the brige when i heard shots. pg)131 How do they expect my brother to hear gun shots. He doesn't hear anything at all half the time. He just keeps walking. He knew that when he shot him. I remeber the police flipping over my brother and he was smiling when they did it. I can't remeber much after that besides being on a police car. I couldn'y see color anymore. Everything was black and gray it was scayr. I knew something was wrong. pg)132 I couldn't hear my self speak i screamed at the top of my lungs and I still coulnd't hear it. I started shaking and my head was throbbing. Somone said something about the hospital. I didn;t wanna go. I punched the window in the police car and cut my wrists so i hadda go to the hospital.
along, I wasn't invited but i just went. I begged him not to kinda like Steve always did to me. He wouldn't listen to me. He kept trying to get the door open. I didn't want him to get caught. pg)130 He got in and turned on the light like an idiot. He just looked around the store and didn't care who saw him. He let out al the animals. I watched cause i was shaking real bad. I just cried and it hurt bad to cry. He had the fish in his hands. I knew where he was going the river. I heard the cop sirens and just tried to run. I head a mixture of noises. I was at the brige when i heard shots. pg)131 How do they expect my brother to hear gun shots. He doesn't hear anything at all half the time. He just keeps walking. He knew that when he shot him. I remeber the police flipping over my brother and he was smiling when they did it. I can't remeber much after that besides being on a police car. I couldn'y see color anymore. Everything was black and gray it was scayr. I knew something was wrong. pg)132 I couldn't hear my self speak i screamed at the top of my lungs and I still coulnd't hear it. I started shaking and my head was throbbing. Somone said something about the hospital. I didn;t wanna go. I punched the window in the police car and cut my wrists so i hadda go to the hospital. pg)133 Steve asked if I ever went back to the neighborhood. I never did. Neither did he. Steve got out because he wanted to and he tried his hardest to. He set a goal and reached it. pg)134He wanted to buy me a beer. I don't drink no more I can't I don't like the taste. He wanted to go for dinner. I knew I never would go. He said i look like my brother, my voice is just different. Steve wasn't the same as when we were kids. He was a completely different person ghost like. pg)135 He shouted a he walked away, "I'll see ya sometime." I knew he never would I didn't wanna remeber the past but its taking along time to forget.
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